Jokes Sorted by Date

A Christmas Story   'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed. He cussed out the elves and threw down his list. Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.  I have a good mind to scrap the whole works! I've busted my ass for damn near a year,  Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear? The ... (Read More)

>>You Know Your Church Is A Redneck Church if...   the finance committee >>refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of >>the members knows how to play one. >> >>You Know Your Church Is A Redneck Church if... >>people ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish >>were bass or ... (Read More)

A Somali arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you, Mr. American, for letting me in this country, and giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care and free education!" But the passer-by says "You are mistaken. I am Mexican". The man goes ... (Read More)

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Taliban on the Run --- Fifty Ways to Leave Your Bunker --- Freebeard --- Don't Cry for Me, Al Qaeda --- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Cut Off Her Hands and Publicly Stoned Her to Death ... (Read More)

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An Indian-born economist once explained his personal theory of reincarnation to his graduate economics class. "If you are a good economist, a virtuous economist," he said, "you are reborn as a physicist. But if you are an evil, wicked economist, you are reborn as a sociologist." 

True story: In the clinical part of their education, second-year medical students learn to give the male equivalent of a pelvic exam, the whole check your prostate and hernias thing. Apparently this sort of exam finishes on the shaft of the penis. A young woman who was the last in her group, and the last person of the day, to learn it also believes... (Read More)

An Irish priest got stopped for speeding. The trooper smelled alcohol on his breath and spied an empty wine bottle on the car's floor. He said, "Father, have you been drinking?" ... (Read More)

The American television show "Trading Spouses" on the Fox network spotlights what happens when a Christian fundamentalist wife shares a home with a family of Pagans: http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/2681739?htv=12 Two words come to mind: Mentally ill. Unfortunately, such unquestioning fundamentalism encourages this type of ... (Read More)